


one more for the road

by snarkymuch



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Angst, College Student Peter Parker, Dead May Parker (Spider-Man), Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Partying, Recreational Drug Use, Underage Drinking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:09:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28724118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snarkymuch/pseuds/snarkymuch
Summary: Written for the following prompt:Peter's in college and the stress gets to him so for a while he like loses his mind and turns to partying but his family helps him?ORPeter struggles with his grief over losing May, and college pushes Peter a little too far. He copes by drinking.
Relationships: Ned Leeds & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 14
Kudos: 88





	one more for the road

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spideyreids2003](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spideyreids2003/gifts).



> Just a quick prompt fill. It's a little angsty. I hope you like it.

“Peter, maybe you should call it a night, get some extra sleep.” Ned tried to reason, but Peter wasn’t listening. He was three drinks in and working toward a buzz already and didn’t want to go back to their dorm. 

College turned out to be different than Peter had expected. He’d planned to focus on his studies, make some new friends, get good grades, and impress Tony. He was attending the man’s alma mater, after all, but things had a funny way of working out.

Peter had started school with big dreams, but a few months into the year, and he was struggling against the current to stay afloat. His grades didn’t come as easily for him as they did in high school, and his life wasn’t as easy either. Everything was more complicated. There were days he felt like a failure, and maybe in some ways, he was one. He certainly wasn’t handling the stress like he should. 

He’d spent his life abiding by the rules, and maybe that played a role in his new coping mechanism. Perhaps it was a cry for help. Either way, the partying he had been doing drowned out the noise in his head and made things a little easier to deal with at the moment, though there was always a price to pay. 

The more he partied, the more his grades slipped. The more his grades slipped, the more defeated he felt, making him want an escape, so he would drink himself into a stupor and try to forget. He knew it was a problem, but he couldn’t see a better solution. So the cycle continued unchecked. 

Then there was Ned, who stood in front of where Peter sat on the couch, giving him his best disapproving face. Peter wanted to go back to when they were in high school, and things were simpler between them, but he couldn’t, so he needed to accept how things were now, which meant that Peter wasn’t the same kid he used to be. Drinking had given him a way to muffle the chaos in his head and have a little fun, too. Ned didn’t understand, probably because Ned was better than him. He always had been. 

Peter put up a good front, but he had always struggled beneath his mask. He knew he wasn’t perfect, and now that he was in college, facing pressure like never before, that mask was cracking. It was clear for anyone who dared look that Peter was falling apart. Some people might see a college kid partying and having fun, but if someone were to look closely, they’d see it was more nefarious. Peter was using it as a cover to hide his failures.

He knew it wasn’t good, but Peter never claimed to be great at self-care. 

“I’m good here.” Peter sipped from his Solo cup, glancing up at Ned. "Really, I’ll just stay for a few hours, and then I’ll walk back.”

Ned pursed his lips. “I don’t like leaving you here. It’s never good, Peter. You’ve been doing this too much lately. What would May think?”

Peter downed the last of his drink. That was a low blow. May had been dead for nearly a year. A man had charged into the emergency room, shooting anyone unlucky enough to cross his path. Of course, May hadn’t stayed hidden. She’d run across the hall to grab a child and got shot. By the time they could get to her, she was gone. 

Peter didn’t need to be a psychiatrist to know that her death played a part in his current spiral. At minimum, it didn’t help his sleep, which came at a premium these days, something that wasn’t helping matters at all. 

After his aunt died, Tony stepped up to help him, paying for his college and making sure he wanted nothing, making Peter’s current situation feel even worse. He wasn’t just letting down May’s memory by partying like he was, but he was letting down Tony, too. Peter didn’t want to think about what Tony would say about his new lifestyle. The worst thing was, he’d probably be understanding, telling Peter it was okay and sharing stories about his own struggles, which just made Peter feel worse. 

He deserved Tony’s anger, maybe some choice words. You didn’t blow your college career by partying and not expect some consequences. 

What kind of person did this make him? Not Spider-Man, that was for sure. He hadn’t even gone out to patrol in months. He didn’t feel like a hero anymore. He and Spider-man couldn’t be further apart. Maybe it was time they parted ways, at least for a while. 

Peter pushed himself up to get another drink, nearly bumping into Ned, who had to hastily step back to avoid him. 

“Peter, come on, man.” Ned’s voice chased after him.

Peter glanced over his shoulder, briefly meeting Ned’s gaze. He didn’t like the concern he saw, so he looked away, going back to making another drink. 

“I’m really fine, Ned. Trust me.”

“Maybe a year ago, before everything got bad, I would have, but I don’t think you’re thinking straight anymore. I think you need to talk to someone.”

Peter turned around, taking a sip of his drink. It was more alcohol than soda, and it burned his throat. He welcomed the feeling. It would take a lot to get him drunk. His mutation made it hard to get there, but the payoff was worth it. He relished the moment when the world blurred, and everything hurt a little less.

The music thumped in the background, and someone bumped into Ned, making him frown and cast his disapproving glare in their direction. Peter swirled his drink in the red plastic cup, watching it slosh around before sucking down the contents in a few big gulps. When he looked at Ned, his expression had turned hurt. His shoulders slumping, Ned shook his head, stepping forward to put a hand on Peter’s shoulder. 

“I’ll see you back at the dorm, right? Not too late?” Ned asked. 

Peter pushed back against his guilt and smiled. “Yeah, yeah, I won’t be out past three.”

Sighing, Ned patted his shoulder twice and then disappeared into the crowd. Peter stared at the people for a moment before turning back to refill his drink. The ache in his chest was back, and he wanted to forget. He wanted to let everything go and have fun.

Peter downed another drink, then headed for the couch where a bowl of pills was being passed around. He didn’t normally get into drugs, but he was missing May, and he wanted to have a little fun. He joined them, sitting next to a girl he recognized from one of his classes. He didn’t know what it was that he took, but he didn’t care either. Soon, he felt himself relaxing, and he spent the rest of the night drinking and melting into the couch. 

He woke up in the morning or thought it was morning, but from the bright sun coming in the windows, he realized it might be closer to noon. He wasn’t in his bed, and when he turned his cheek, it scratched on the polyester fabric of the couch. Blinking his eyes, it took a moment to place himself, but then he saw the cups and beer bottles, and hazy memories of the previous night drifted back. 

Groaning, he scrubbed a hand over his eyes and sat up, his foot bumping into a body on the floor. Squinting, he looked at the ground and saw someone was passed out on the floor between the couch and coffee table. 

He needed to get out of here. Ned was going to kill him. 

He stepped over the body and patted his pockets for his phone. He needed to see the time. He’d probably missed class again, and his professor wasn’t going to be understanding. He’d already missed a bunch. 

Feeling his phone in his pocket, he grabbed it and checked the time. Shit. It was after eleven. As he went to stuff his phone back in his pocket, Thunderstruck started playing, and he looked down to see Tony’s face lighting up the screen. 

Double shit. 

Scrubbing a hand over his face quickly, he answered the call and brought the phone to his ear. He scratched at his hair as he greeted Tony.

“Hey, Tony, what’s up?”

“I should ask you. Ned called.”

Peter’s heart skipped a beat. He’d be talking to Ned later about boundaries. For now, though, he needed to deal with the fallout. 

“Oh, really? What did he say?” He tried to keep his voice even, but it raised in tone at the end. His nerves were getting to him. 

“He said you didn’t come home. Again. Seems to be a running problem with you lately. I thought everything was going okay. What’s going on, Peter?”

“No, it’s no big deal. I just stayed out late, um, studying.”

Tony hummed. “That’s interesting. Tell you what. I need to straighten away a few things here, and then I’ll fly out. I can be there tonight.”

“Wait, what? No, no, no, you don’t need to come out here.” The last thing he needed was to see Tony’s expression fall when he saw what a mess Peter was. “It’s fine. It’s all fine. I swear. You don’t need to come out here.”

“I’ll see you tonight, kid. Maybe shower or something before I get there. Ned mentioned something about you going through a grunge phase.”

“I’m not—” He started to argue, but Tony hung up. Huffing out a frustrated breath, Peter shoved the phone back into his pocket and weaved his way through the mess to get back to his dorm. 

He was going to kill Ned. 

“Why did you call Tony?” Peter asked as soon as he was in the door. 

Ned was at the desk, working on his computer. He turned to look at Peter. His expression was hard to read, though. Peter thought he looked a little smug, but maybe he was just imagining it. 

“I’ve tried talking to you for months, and it hasn’t done any good. You’re blowing your chance here. You spend more time at parties than you do in class. It’s not cool, Peter. If I can’t stop you, maybe Mr. Stark can.” He finished with a shrug and turned back to his computer. 

Peter was angry, but he couldn’t blame Ned. He was only trying to help, part of what made Ned a better person than Peter. Sighing, he walked over to his bed and flopped down. 

What was he going to do?

At some point, he showered and put on some questionable clothes. He found them under his bed. Other than a few wrinkles, they seemed okay. At least they didn’t smell. He needed to prioritize things a little better. Laundry came after everything else.

He skipped his classes that day, too stressed about Tony coming to attend. He was already in deep with his professors. He couldn’t see how missing another day would hurt. 

Sometime after their ramen dinner they made in a coffee pot, Ned left to visit a friend, leaving Peter to anxiously await Tony’s arrival. 

At seven o’clock, there was a knock at the door, and Peter had to take a deep breath to collect himself before opening the door. 

It was Tony. 

“Jesus, kid. Ned wasn’t kidding about the grunge phase,” Tony said by way of greeting. 

Peter forced a smile, running his fingers through his hair. “Come in, sorry it’s not much, but, um, it’s a dorm. You’ve been here, so you know.”

Tony nodded and entered the room, turning around slowly and taking it in. He settled in the desk chair, looking at Peter expectantly. “So, I think we need to talk, and depending on what you, depends on whether you get to stay, or if you take some time and collect yourself.”

It felt like something had punched Peter in the gut. He’d never considered not being able to stay. Tony wouldn’t do that to him, would he? He scrambled for something to say, anything to make this better. 

“It’s not that bad. I don’t know what Ned said, but it’s fine.”

“That you’ve been getting wasted every night, and not surprisingly, your grades are slipping. Ned tells me you’ve been missing classes because you're too hungover to go. He's worried about you—I’m worried about you.”

Tony’s eyes were soft and full of concern, and Peter didn’t deserve it. He’d been screwing up, and he knew it, and Tony should be angry. He should hate him for wasting his money. Instead, he just looked worried, and that stung worse. 

Part of him wanted to lie, to make up some half-truth to explain his behavior, but another part of him was tired. Now that Tony knew, Peter didn’t want to fight it. Since May had died, he’d been struggling to kick his feet to stay above water. He’d made some bad choices, but maybe he didn’t need to drown here. 

“I’m sorry,” Peter’s voice cracked on the words. “I’m sorry, Tony. I’ve really made a mess of things, and I don’t even know why.” Tears pricked at his eyes, and he wiped them in frustration. “I’ve really fucked things up.”

Tony stood, crossing over to Peter and pulling him into a hug before he could object.

Peter melted into his arms, feeling grounded for the first time in a while. Tony was solid and real and there. He existed and wasn’t going away. His presence eased Peter’s anxious thoughts. Even his cologne was familiar and made him feel safe and at home. 

After a minute, Tony pulled back, holding Peter by the shoulders.

Peter wiped his tears again, sniffling. “I’m sorry, Tony.”

Tony shook his head. “We’ll figure this out. I think you know I have some history with drinking and partying.”

Peter gave him a watery smile. “Yeah, I remember Rhodey telling me you peed in your suit.”

Tony laughed. “It was warm for a minute at least, but it puddled in my boot.”

“Ew, Tony. That’s gross.”

“I’m sure you’ve done some regrettable things, too. I remember what it’s like to be single and in college. Now, here's what we're going to do. We’re going to sit down, and you’re going to show me what’s happening with your grades.”

“You don’t have to. I can handle it.”

Tony raised a brow. “Really? You’re gonna try for that? I think we both know you need a hand. We can figure this out. I honestly think it might be good for you to take some time off.”

“And do what? I need school.”

“And see a therapist. Talking to someone can help. I wouldn’t be surprised if you still haven’t processed losing your aunt. I think even a few months to get your head on straight might make a difference. Come back at the start of a new year—a fresh start and all that jazz.”

Peter frowned. He didn’t want to miss school, but he also felt like he was spiraling out of control, and he didn’t know if he could salvage things. Maybe what Tony was offering wasn’t so bad. 

Tony squeezed his shoulder. “Just think about it, kid. We don’t need to decide today, just know the option is there. I can pull some strings. They don’t name a building after you for nothing.”

Peter nodded. “Yeah, can I think about it?”

“Sure, like I said, we have time. Now, why don’t we skip looking over the damage and just go grab a bite? You look like a hobo skeleton. Have you eaten anything green this year?”

Peter gave him a weak laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “Is ramen a vegetable?”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Not quite, kiddo, but good try. God, I don’t miss college.”

They went out to dinner, and Peter spent the night thinking over Tony’s offer. He even ate something green. The last year had been a disaster, and Peter didn’t even know how to get back on track. Maybe a reset was what he needed. May had always wanted him to succeed, and Peter wanted to make her proud, something he wasn’t doing now. 

He didn’t need to think any longer. He knew what he had to do. All he needed was a little time and maybe a little help, and he would be okay. He was just glad to have Tony around to help him. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it :)  
> You can find me on tumblr [here](https://snarky-drabbles.tumblr.com/). I'm @snarky-drabbles


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